They come in all sizes, shapes, colours, weight and even height. That annoying fact of life when you’ve moved on and definite that the relationship is over, but unfortunately your ex is keen on sticking around. Such exes, we label them as pests and, lucky for you, there are easy ways to get rid of them.

The wasp

They’re present during the December party scene ruining your turn-up because they only care about you when you’re having fun without them. When they’re sober, you’d swear they’ve fallen off of the face of the earth because you never hear from them.

Pest Control: You will need all the ready-to-use products for this; I mean Raid, Doom, etc.

Block his number. If you bump into him, pretend he is not there and  send a memo out to your friends to act as backup should you need any, updating them on the situation and how you need to steer away from that ex.

The tick

This is the one-sided partner, the neurotic vindictive ex demanding another chance. You’ve gently let him down before, but like a parasite, he enjoys sucking the life out of you and whatever vulnerability you have.

Pest control: Physical pest control where you include your squad, those fierce friends or even your big brothers to handle this problem.

Fruit flies

The in-a-relationship with someone… rather “everyone” but pestering you type of ex. These people believe the world revolves around them. The only thing they care about is how many girls they can hit-up this festive season.

Pest control: There’s only one way to fix this problem, like one would use a mouse trap to get rid of mice, set a trap for him where each girl threatens to expose him, especially if he is hitting on you and your crew.

Bald-faced hornet

The bald-faced hornet is the dangerously in love type that you can’t get over.  And they know it. They have a good way of destroying your self-esteem and destroying your spirit. You don’t need such this festive season.

Pest control: Just keep busy and try to stay as far away from him as possible.

The cockroach

This is your ultimate pest. Firstly let’s just remember that nobody likes cockroaches. They breed in your walls, turn-up in your cereal forcing you to throw everything away, they appear on your pillows and no matter how many times you kill them, they somehow resurrect themselves – urgh! They are just super annoying.
Pest control: They’re quite harmless so my advice is that you go silent and not react to them.

Holding image: Onele Liwani