Kuthwa isizathu sokuba singanxibi iibhodi is because ziyadura, and asinamali, asizi afford-i. Ayisuba yichoice yethu. Kodwa enyinto endidikayo kuyo yonke lento is the fact that if you’ve got saggy boobs then you’re not allowed to, “apparently”– like?!? What is the meaning??

Oh also, they don’t want to see everything. VALA AMEHLO MNTA’ SEKHAYA, XA UNGAFUNI UBONA IBELE LAM. Ilula nje na lento. Kutheni sisokolisana nje ngamabele? Uz’utsho ukuba le nipple yeyethu okanye ndiyirenta kuwe, okanye yiphone nje enye into esidibanisayo ngalenipple.

HAYI KE CAPTAIN NIPPLE HIMSELF!

SERGEANT OF THE BRA SIZES!

MAMELA, NDITHI WENA WARRIOR OF THE BRA CUPS!!

He has spoken bethunana. If wena ungu-double D sabu-G nton-nton, you’re not allowed ukuba u-free the nipple, wear a bra.

Yeyi! Uhambe ngawo loo mabele wena. MAMELA, uwa-free-ishe!

MAMELA ubene ndawu engathi idlala ngawo la mabele abengathi yi yoyo.

Written by Samantha Sunduza

This piece appears on the current issue of SAX Magazine, whihc is now available at UCT Store on Upper Campus, Tarka in Rondebosch and That Place in Observatory until the 11 April 11, for R30.

SAX Appeal is the best known student publication in South Africa which has been running for the last 78 years. It raises over half a million rand for charity, and all proceeds donated go to SHAWCO. All proceeds from SAX Appeal go towards the Students’ Health and Welfare Centres’ Organisation (SHAWCO). SHAWCO is a non-government organisation with 5 centres and runs over 15 health and education projects annually-it has over 1 500 volunteers annually . (For more information please visit: www.shawco.org).  

The 2017 edition of SAX Magazine, themed Pembera (Shona for “celebrate”), is a celebration and meditation on the ways and existence of marginalised students: the disabled bodied, LGBTQI+ community, people of colour, womxn, poor and the elderly students.