5 friends we all love to hate and hate to love

Simamkele Matuntuta

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Friendships, by definition, are relationships of mutual affection. Friends are people to share sad, happy, even drunken moments with. But, in reality, we’re not all the same. Some friends take more than they give, and others you don’t know whether to love or hate. Here are five friends you might recognise in your own social […]

Emotionally wrecked ball
Emotionally wrecked ball

Friendships, by definition, are relationships of mutual affection. Friends are people to share sad, happy, even drunken moments with. But, in reality, we’re not all the same. Some friends take more than they give, and others you don’t know whether to love or hate. Here are five friends you might recognise in your own social circle.

1.The clingy-as-glue friend

This friend is the obsessive type, sending you endless texts. And if you do not respond, you immediately get a call: “Hey, I sent you a text like a second ago. Why are you not responding to me?” They are always around you, go wherever you go and they seem to want to do everything with you. And often, jealousy creeps in because they just can’t stand you having other friends. It’s even possible that they hate those other friends.

2.The one who #NeverPaysBackTheMoney

It doesn’t matter how many times they have borrowed money from you and not paid it back, they’ll come back to ask you for more with the same promise to “pay it back”. Trying very hard to suppress a scream, you’ll respond, “That’s what you said the last time and the previous times before that!” But, because you are nice and you love them, you do exactly as they knew you would, and lend them the cash.

3.The emotionally wrecked ball

You have some good news you want to share, so you call your friend, naturally. As soon as you’ve said, “Hey, how are you?” you regret it. You shouldn’t have, knowing how your choma is. And BAM, as expected, they start sinking your mood: “I don’t know, I had such a bad day. I’m stressed and everything is just falling apart.” You need ice cream, chocolate and maybe wine or beer just to help you help them calm down.

4.The weekend special

You won’t hear from this bra until it’s Friday, and he calls you with an “Eita mfethu, what’s popping this weekend?” This is the friend who doesn’t really bother themselves with details of your life. If he were to write or talk about you, all they’d probably come up with is, “He drinks Heineken with a straw.”

5.The “are we even friends” friend 

You never ever talk when you’re at parties or in a crowd. But when you bump into each other, let’s say a mall, you engage in these awkward conversations, consisting of vague questions like “So how are you”, and “What have you been up to”. There’s always an excuse why you never call each other: “Oh I’ve changed my phone, and don’t have your number.” And you’re always promising to meet up, “We should go out sometime,” one of you will say. But, as you well know, none of you ever will.

Image: Andiswa Mkosi

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